:: BDSM Training | Spankings

9c1f4edb1cc041629f38d84bc44f0dc9So, here’s another way a few folks have found their way here. Phrases like BDSM spanking, D/s spanking, spank training, good spanking, and Dom spankings. 

I love giving Kasai a good spanking, and so this seems like a good place to spend some time. I won’t go into the “whys” of spanking – I’ve covered that elsewhere. But I will say that whether it’s for discipline, punishment, or pleasure, the following general rules should help you out if you’re looking for some basic knowledge on the dynamic for a spanking.

SAFETY: The first is to have a way to communicate with each other – if your sub is gagged, she still needs to be able to say “I need you to fucking stop right now!”, if she’s not gagged, use a safe word such as “Red” (FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN!), “Yellow” (We can continue, but I need to process this for a minute) and “Green” (More Sir!?!). Whatever your word(s) are, you don’t want them to be everyday words, and definitely not “stop”, “don’t” or “no”. 

SAFE ZONES: Where do you spank? Well, the ass is a great place to start! How the sub’s body is positioned will affect the severity of the impact play – the tighter the ass, the harder it will feel. Your not limited to only spanking her ass – impact play can be applied to her pussy, breasts, meaty portion of the thighs, upper back. The big thing, is you need to KNOW what your sub is going through – and that means experimentation. Begin soft and increase ever so slightly to be able to learn how to read her reactions. 

If you strike any surface area of the body where there isn’t a lot of muscle or tissue between the skin and bone – it’s going to hurt. Think of hands & wrists, achilles tendon, front of calves, ribs – these areas you want to avoid. Other similar areas like the bottoms of feet can be played with – but not nearly as severe as other locations. How hard you strike also depends on what your using.

THE INSTRUMENTS: What do you use? Hands, rods, whips, floggers, hair brushes, spoons, paddles, crops – these are all excellent, but each one has its own benefits and limitations.  The hand is the classic “go to” – it’s more personal, you can ‘feel’ how hard your striking, and when spanking appropriate areas, you can get on it pretty hard. Rods are great too! You spend money on quality canes or use a dowel. I recommend going thin until you know what to expect (the thinner the more flexible equalling less energy transfer into the body). Rods are great because they are a lot quieter than other instruments – but they will leave solid marks too. Don’t strike bone with them either.

Whips can be fun, but more dangerous. The longer the whip and the further away you are from your sub the more damage it will create. I remember playing with whips back in the day, and being struck several times across the back – it doesn’t feel good, take my word for it. But you could find a shorter whip that will deliver a sting without the extreme punch of a bullwhip. The benefit of a whip is it’s obvious you mean business. The downside is….you mean business. Crops are similar to whips without the extreme transfer of energy. Depending on how long it is, and how wide the end is will dictate how much of a punch it will garnish – but crops also have the appearance of meaning business too~ They are more silent than your hand or a paddle too.

Floggers are an excellent choice! From rope to leather they are all great. Rope floggers will typically allow you to really put some weight behind it, because they strike over a much larger surface area. If the rope is hard, or if the leather is thin – it will create a more intense sensation. If there are knots at the ends – there will be a higher sting with each strike. Floggers can also be easily made as well!

Paddles, wooden spoons, and hairbrushes. Depending on what the material is – the spanking is going to hurt. Theres a reason mom’s use wooden paddles and utensils on unruly kids – the shit hurts. A leather paddle has more give, and isn’t going to sting as bad. The wider the less intense. 

AFTERCARE. Impact play can leave a sub drained, bruised, skin broken, and in deep sup space. Apply lotion afterwards. Kasai bruises fairly easy, and I don’t mind that she does. Actually, I enjoy watching them heal with each passing day. You’ll probably need to hold your sub after a good spanking too. You need to take proper care after any scene, but especially one where impact play was used. 

SAFTY. This is where I started, and it’s where I want to end. First thing to close this out: if you have never spanked with a particular instrument, or you are wanting to explore impact play on a new part of the body – you MUST go light at first, even for the whole session. Learn about her body – how it reacts, how long it takes to recoup. Learn how it sounds and feels depending on the intensity. The last thing you want to do is pull out a bullwhip and go cracking on her breasts from 10 feet away! When using a new instrument, the ass is the best place to begin. The thinner and/or the longer an item is the more it’s going to hurt.

Doms – take breaks and talk to your sub – ask her how she’s doing. You can use a 1-10 scale for 1 being “bring it!” to 10 meaning “I’m going to fucking kill you when you let me go!”. Submissives – you need to know that its okay to use one of your safe words. I know you don’t like to use them, but it’s okay – we want and need to know if we’ve pushed you to that limit. It’s also okay to say “DAMN! That hurt!”. Odds are, we’re going to listen and give you a second to process it – of if we’re in a mood, we’ll give you one more!

 

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