:: BDSM Predicament Bondage

Predicament bondage requires a lot of creativity, patience, and constant supervision. But there is more it requires as well. The bond and level of trust between Dominant and submissive needs to be firmly established.

The goal of predicament bondage is to limit the amount of movement for a submissive in such a way, that should movement be selected – the sub will find themselves in a more uncomfortable position. Consider the phrase “stuck between a rock and a hard place”.

tumblr_mlrnbafJin1s8y81go1_500The starting position will typically cause muscle fatigue. As the sub wears out, it will force the submissive into the secondary position, which will bring sensations with it. Or, the submissive may not be wearing out physically, but through the movement after receiving pleasure the pain is felt. For example, picture the image that has a sub on her back – suppose her legs were resting flat on a table (but still connected to her breasts via the rig) – now, make her squirm through orgasm(s) – imagine that in that process, her legs will move and doing so will tug on her breasts.

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:: BDSM Bondage | Body Harness

Placing your sub into a body harness requires patience – it takes time to put your sub into a harness, and it takes time to remove the harness. But during that initial time, there is a build up of anticipation and wonder. Harnesses can be elaborate, or simple. They can hold your sub in position for a good spanking, or restrict movement. Here’s a couple videos to demonstrate two different harnesses.

:: BDSM Breast Bondage

Once you learn to tie a few basic knots and can make your way around some basic wraps that are useful for restraining, you can begin to move a little deeper into the world of shibari. Not all shibari is hard or intricate – like with anything there are some that are more challenging than others.

Here’s a few videos on doing some basic breast wraps.

This next one is in French – but it’s a good video none the less:

Here’s a multi-rope Takate Kote.

Hope you enjoy the videos.

:: BDSM Bondage

The first video demonstrates a few good knots to be proficient at, along with some sound advice. Some people who don’t know how to tie the proper knot, tie a lot. In bondage, this can be detrimental – you need to know how to tie basic knots and when to use what when and where. In addition, a good knot shouldn’t be impossible to take apart.

One thing you’ll notice in the next few video’s is that when it comes to bondage, it’s paramount to not cross rope across itself as you’re wrapping your submissive. You want the rope to lay parallel with each other. Otherwise, it will bite and pinch on your partner. And remember, a wrap doesn’t have to be tight to be effective.

The first one below is just a basic wrap. The next one is a real simple rope cuff followed by a slightly more intricate wrap called the claw. They are all fun and easy to use. The videos below are from two knotty boys, who do a great job at teaching and demonstrating knots.

:: Bondage Rope Basics

When it comes to thickness of rope there are a few considerations. The wider the rope, there is more displacement across the skin. Wider rope needs to be used when doing suspension work – and can be used around upper arms and thighs. Thinner rope is excellent for more intricate work. When using thinner rope as the base, more wraps will be required. 8-9m or 5/16”-3/8” is fairly standard. Anything larger would be considered wider, anything smaller would be thinner. You won’t be able to use 8mm around fingers and you couldn’t use it for suspension either.

Another way to increase the distribution of thinner ropes is to double back turning a 5mm rope into a 10mm – the point is you want to cover the same amount of surface area on the skin. Obviously with thinner rope you will be required to use longer lengths as well. Larger rope is also harder to tie off.

When it comes to the type of rope, there is a lot of personal preference involved. Hardcore shibari riggers will not use synthetic ropes, but there is nothing wrong with them. It’s just a preference – a particular look and feel they desire from natural rope.

Natural fibers do have some good qualities. They have more tooth – or the ability to grab, and stick onto itself. This is due to the friction between the rope, and in many cases you don’t need to actually tie natural rope, just a few wraps and then tuck the end.

Cotton isn’t a good idea for suspension, because it is weaker and tends to jam up in the knot. Braided and twisted rope offer different aesthetics though twisted rope can twist apart (though twisted rope does leave beautiful patterns on the skin afterwards).

There are also different fibers to choose from. Natural fibers include hemp, linen, cotton, jute, sisal, and silk. Synthetic materials include nylon, polyester, polyethylene, and multifilament polypropylene (MPF). Again, it’s a personal preference and what you can afford. Don’t be afraid to go to the hardware store and find some inexpensive rope to use as a test – still, try to get something in a good diameter and feel. The stiffer the rope, the harder it will be to tie off and lay properly across the skin. Remember, you’re not trying to secure a grill in the back of a pick up truck.

You will also use personal preference regarding the color of the rope. Some people like natural colors because of the warmth, others prefer black because of the contrast, or using bright colors like red

Length is another important factor and different lengths are often required depending on what you are doing. Just securing wrists will only need a length of about 5 feet while doing  body harness may require lengths up to 70’ (depending on the complexity of the harness). Different body sizes will require different lengths. Just remember, it’s better to have a rope that’s a little too long than too short.

A good starter kit should include:

(2) 1/4” – 6 feet – wrists and ankles

(4) 1/4” – 23 feet – breasts, arms, legs, partial harness

(4) 1/4” – 10 feet – multi-use

I like to have several pieces handy that are about 10’ in length as well – I can use these in a variety of ways from securing Kasai to furniture or stretching her body out.

:: BDSM Bondage Safety

As I mentioned in my previous post – safety is paramount during any kind of bondage play. At a minimum, the Dominant should have a pair of EMT scissors or knife available in addition to having other items needed depending on the location and duration of the bondage. For example, for an extended period, having food and water.

When exploring bondage, it’s best to practice on something other than a person. You don’t want to make a mistake when securing the rope on the submissive. You can’t learn how to “do” bondage by reading a book, you have to “do” it. Even watching a video isn’t going to teach you – you have to experience it. That said – I highly recommend reading books and watching videos, but you will need practice to become proficient.

There needs to be constant communication and supervision. Never leave someone who is bonded alone for any extended period of time. If while being bound, the submissive feels “bad pain” – speak up. It’s too easy to make a simple adjustment in the ropes. The Dom should continue to ask and ensure everything is going well.

I enjoy seeing the marks left in Kasai’s skin after she’s been bound – but bondage should never be so tight that it cuts off circulation of blood. You might be surprised to know that even if you can stick 1-2 fingers in between the ropes and the skin it can still be restraining to the submissive.

I realize that there is a lot of imagery including severe breast bondage, but if you’re cutting off circulation you can cause severe damage – so don’t do it. As a general rule, you can press on a finger nail to watch and see how long it takes the original color to return. If it takes more than a few seconds to return to normal, circulation may be impaired. Don’t tie off at joints such as the elbow or knee.

Until you and your partner are very comfortable with the particular bondage you are attempting, don’t mix gags in with it. If something begins to go wrong, the submissive needs to be able to communicate quickly.

Suspension bondage is beautiful – but is an advanced form. Actually, anything that raises arms overhead can have similar consequences. Blood flow is restricted in these scenarios and will require much more skill and supervision – and a healthy dose of patience. You don’t rush bondage.

Bondage is a great thing to explore, but don’t feel like you have to rush in. Do so safely, practice a lot, and enjoy it.

:: Bondage Basics

111617793Bondage has several effects that both draw some towards it, as well as away from it.

There is a significant amount of trust required when using any form of bondage – from cuffs, to full body restraints. And that in turn means that the Dominant needs to be safe in everything they do. Having a pair of scissors handy – establishing alternate forms of communication – constant supervision – staying within the limits of their expertise – and it continues.

Bondage is also slow – it requires patience by both the Dominant and the submissive. Cuffs are quick and easy enough; however, anything involving rope requires some preparation before hands (practicing) and time during before being able to move on to anything different.

These two areas both pull people in and keep them out. Some relationships don’t have the foundation of trust required – other people may not be patient enough to spend 10-30 minutes placing their partner in bondage. But others – particularly those within a D/s dynamic are drawn to bondage for these very reasons.

It accents the Dominance and submission. It heightens trust. It requires skill and patience.

Bondage can be used for binding or erotic aesthetics. You can use rope, cuffs, ties, saran wrap, bondage tape, velcro, spreader bars, furniture, straps, chain, or other restraints. You can bind only hands to more elaborate uses that encompass the entire body.

Bondage is used as a medium for the power exchange – sometimes it is used to make the submissive more accessible to the Dominant, other times bondage is used for its own sake.

Throughout the next few posts, I’ll discuss some different forms of bondage and provide some links to additional resources.